3 years ago, my wife was told that she could not have children. After a year of "trying" we were surprised by a pregnancy that didn't require medical intervention.
Less than 60 days ago, my daughter, was born (completely healthy) and in less than 17 hours she was taken from us. There is a loss of words during this time and I am trying to understand what has happened (still waiting the autopsy results).
I am noticing that my story is coming out in short burst (sometimes not necessarily planned burst) to strangers. This is of course making me feel like I am losing control of my thoughts/voice.
My wife tires to speak with me. But I have no words to say. So it seems to her as though I am staring off and don't want to speak.
Lastly, but certainly not least, I still look at my wife as an absolute beauty. I find myself staring and admiring her, which only causes me to feel like a douche for having sexual thoughts.